Что с этим делать?

Я уже в который раз ловлю себя на том, что неправильно отвечаю людям.

Вот говорит человек – в личной беседе, на форуме, ну неважно где – вот мне так плохо, у меня такое-то и такое-то, и что с этим делать, мне совершенно непонятно. Ну и, собственно, вопрошает, что же ему с этим страшным делать. А я, как наивный суслик, на полном серьезе начинаю рассказывать: а ты вот так попробуй, а вот еще это может сработать, или то, а еще есть вот такой способ. А человек мне в ответ – ну что ты, это не поможет, а то – вообще неправильно, а вот это меня не спасет совершенно, у меня же так все трагично. И искренне на меня обижается, потому что я же недооцениваю степень его страданий. А я искренне недоумеваю: ну я же столько всего предложила, а уж сколько всего можно придумать на основе моих предложений… И мы расходимся, недовольные друг другом.

А ведь на самом деле человеку просто не нужно решение проблемы. Ему нужно, чтобы все прониклись и сказали “бедный, тебе так сложно, а ты такой молодец, что все это выносишь”. И понятно, что когда никто не пишет, а все говорят “та ну, вот сделай то-то и то-то, и все будет хорошо”. И получается, что его вселенская проблема как-то сразу умаляется и становится вполне себе такой обыденной и даже немного банальной. Обидно, да?

А ведь если бы человек действительно хотел решать эту проблему, он бы живо обсуждал достоинства и недостатки предлагаемых вариантов. Или вообще пришел бы и сказал: вот у меня есть такие и такие решения, что вы думаете по этому поводу. Но он-то этого не говорит, и, соответственно, хочет совсем другого.Ну и получается очередной, как говорится, коммуникативный диссонанс.

Другой вопрос: что мне с этим делать? :) писать сочувствия я не особо люблю. Остается только не писать. Но тогда меня аж типает, что я не сею крупицы мудрости :D

Буду думать.

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  1. Zelenola

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